all I do is bleed

Holy fuck. All I do is bleed.

Fertility issues suuuuucked. A truly terrible process I wouldn’t wish on anyone. But I thought hey, silver lining, at least when I’m done having kids I basically won’t have periods because my body is weird. Maybe like three a year. And considering I want to be done pushing out babies like 2 decades before menopause, let’s consider the like 200 less periods as a major win.

Well, fuck me I guess. In December I bled for five weeks straight. Not a lot, only a little but constantly for five fucking weeks. When I called my obgyn they just said yeah well you haven’t had periods with breastfeeding so this might happen. Wow. Cool. After it stopped I got a period about a month later. Weird for me, but okay, body doing normal things for once? With that period I start taking birth control because for some reason a lot of the fertility treatment process involves making sure I don’t get pregnant. Very annoying.

I had to take special birth control while breastfeeding and I already knew I hated this stuff because I was on it when I was first postpartum so Ryan could fuck me raw. But apparently he didn’t trust me enough for creampies and since it made me feel like shit I just stopped taking it all together. Felt pointless.

Anywho. I started taking it again but at the beginning as I’m relearning a schedule I take it two hours late. Well two hours late made me start bleeding again. Awesome. And now, despite no longer being on that and being on something else that should’ve stopped the bleeding I haven’t. I’ve been not bleeding for like 3 of the last idk… maybe 14 weeks?

Why is this on a sex blog? Well one, because it’s my blog and I want to vent. But two, because it ruins sex. Not normal sex, but wow it’s hard to get good content. And also, holy shit, I need someone to eat me out until I cry. Dakota will do it when it’s very light so I haven’t been completely deprived but… I deserve to be eaten until I completely soak the bed at least once a week. I should be gulped like water at 3am and licked like ice cream on a warm summer evening.

I want to be able to scissor!! You know what I’m not going to do the first time I hook up with a woman? Bleed all over her. Not sexy.

I’m grateful there hasn’t really been mood swings or cramps, so if this is my body catching up on all the periods I’ve missed so far in my life I’m still coming out ahead. But oh my god I just want to feel sexy again. I want to be able to film getting railed. I want to ride faces like I’m at a rodeo. Ughhhhhhhhhhhhh.